24th September, 2008
This Is The Beginning Of Pain
There are only a few things in my life right now that are not in limbo: school, upcoming birthday, and braces.
Yes, braces. My dad finally agreed to let me have them and although I knew it was going to be uncomfortable, I didn’t know that it would make my normal activities hurt. Today the orthodontist put in these molar separators. They do exactly what they say; separate the molars. At first, it was uncomfortable because I had (and still do actually) the instinct to take it out, like food stuck in between your teeth. Then I realized how much more uncomfortable it would be: I have a small jaw and my teeth are already overcrowded and smushed together. By sticking in these little rubber things, they are pushing my teeth further into themselves so now everything hurts. I could barely bit into an apple and when I tried to brush my teeth, it hurt like a bitch.
I won’t be able to get the extractions for a few weeks either. However, I get to get the brackets put in on my birthday. Fun, isn’t it? Well, at least they’re not doing the wiring either on my birthday. This is going to be one hell of a process, but I know that it’ll be worth it in the end. In the very long, possibly 2.5-year end.
So that’s one thing that’s on track. Everything else? I don’t know. My dad said that he would temporarily take care of my finances, but he didn’t mention a plan of action, so I still don’t know what’s going on. I thought that I couldn’t apply for another school loan, but apparently, there’s still a Stafford loan, which works like an unsubsidized loan. If I can take that out, maybe I can help my dad, er, myself out.
EC and I need to have another talk. Okay, maybe not need, but I would like to have another one. I don’t like this part of not knowing whether or not I’m officially single or taken and at this point, I like him enough to take the latter status. However, I hate doing stuff like this over the phone or internet, so I want to wait until I see him next. We were sort of planning to meet tonight, but he ended up with work and the rest of our weeks are pretty busy. I’ve got a VSA event tomorrow and Friday and he’s got dinner plans on Saturday, so I don’t know yet. But he did seem very interested in coming up to see me, so maybe that’s a good sign?
I just hope that I’m not overthinking things or jinxing them. EC is the first person who’s actually been able to really catch my eye since SB and it’s a refreshing change for once.
Slowly and with time, things change. It took me a few days to realize that, but nobody really ends up in the same place that you had met them in. Where I was last year or the year before that is not the same place that I am in now, despite the same zip code. I ran into someone, M, working at the grocery store the other day and I remember the last time I had seen her was in Sacramento. It was an interesting surprise because I had never expected to see her in my area, but apparently, she and her husband live in a nearby city. Well, my seeing her surprised me because she was a part of the “past world” as I refer to it and I have not seen anyone in the “past world” in this “new world.” But running into her made me realize again how small this world can be and that sometimes, you can’t really pretend the “past world” didn’t exist.
Tags: braces, Dad, EC
Posted at 10:28 pm | Comments (2)
30th January, 2008
This Is The News
So the guy from my friend’s 21 bash last week? Not interested. And it’s all good with me. I’m not ready for something completely serious right now anyway, right?
Since then, I’ve… done not too much. I walked down the street and applied for a few places. Although I dislike the idea that I have to pick up a retail job because I know that I’m worth so much more than that, I also know that I have bills to pay.
My roommate (SS), her friend, and I went to a stoplight party yesterday. At a stoplight party, each person is supposed to sport one of the three colors: red, yellow, green. Red means that you are taken, yellow stands for “It’s complicated,” and green says “you are good to go!” Well, considering my status, I definitely had to sport the green. All three of us took shots and man, I am such a lightweight. I took just that one shot and then sipped on a mixed drink for the rest of the night, but a few minutes after the shot, I was already a little out of it. But I guess the alcohol helped my social ability to get past my shyness since I was able to approach a cute boy and make conversation with him. I’m surprised that I was able to find someone so quickly! I’ll admit that at first, I was afraid to approach since he was wearing red, but it turned out that he didn’t know it was a stoplight party, so it was all good. Anyway, nothing particularly decided yet between that. It is what it is for now and I’m not going to think too much into it just yet.
Something interesting did happen though. My dad called me yesterday and said that he had deposited money into my account. He pretty much gave me enough to take care of a month of rent. That act totally took me by surprise because I thought that he wanted me to come back home and giving me money would delay my homecoming, wouldn’t it? I know it was an act of love, but I feel as if I’m getting so many different signals from this all, you know? Well, I still need to think about it some more, but I thought I’d share that.
Tags: Dad, party, SS, work
Posted at 10:55 pm | Comment (1)